Pain, Conflict and Death

From the movie, "Shortcut to Happiness"

Daniel Webster (Anthony Hopkins):

"Yes, God could have created any reality he wanted.
But he created this one.
Birth, pain, conflict, and death.
Pain reminds us of all that which hurts us.
Conflict challenges us to be better than we think we are.
And death? Well, death.
Death gives us the chance to sum up all the good we've done
or left undone in life.
Yeah, It is a painful world."

Happiness and Success

"Don't aim at success--the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side-effect of one's personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one's surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long run--in the long run, I say--success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think of it." - Viktor E. Frankl in Man's Search for Meaning

Happiness

Happiness is a choice. I say this because I have found this to be true.

I had observed people who have not been rich, wealthy, or otherwise have material devices to bring happiness, and yet have been happy. These folks have stayed contended in what they have (or do not). This contentment leads to their happiness.

I have observed farmers work hard in scorching sun, with not enough money to even buy a shirt to cover their backs, while they manually till their farms. Even after such physical hardship, they can, and do, find happiness and contentment. How do they do it?

My father once said, that there are two qualitative factors in our lives. One being the 'quality of life' and the other being the 'quality of living'. Even though one factor could influence the other, they are not necessarily congruent.

Someone could have a very high 'quality of living', with the latest things money could buy, and yet may not be content, or happy. Such folks do not enjoy a high 'quality of life'. Their misery probably is with-in them. If it were outside of them, then they should have been able to acquire it, right?

In my earlier example of the farmer, the person does not have a high (or even average) 'quality of living' and yet, due to happiness, he/she does enjoy his/her life.

Another extreme would be situations where a person does not have a good quality of living and does not enjoy his/her life. I pity the poor soul.

The luckiest folks are the ones blessed with both. Happy and having means to live comfortably too.

If happiness is from within, how do we stay, and be happy. Maybe it starts in our minds, or our spirit.

We believe that a person is fit and healthy, if his body, mind and spirit is each fit and healthy. A healthy body houses a healthy mind.

A healthy mind can make the right decisions. Decisions such as between a shorter term easier way, versus a longer term although a tough path.

A healthy mind gives way to a strong spirit. A strong spirit sustains the healthy mind's decisions, even during tough times.

A simple exercise (again thanks to my father) is to say this to myself, every time I find myself unhappy - 'I choose to be happy, no matter what'. It turns out that my mind and spirit is able to find happiness, even if the situation was very depressive. This simple technique has a powerful effect. Over a period of time, it becomes second nature.

Simple, yet beautiful. Happiness attracts positive things in life and spreads in our environment.

Happy folks rebound with some inner- resilient strength even in the bleakest of situations. This strength (which comes with a combination of a healthy body, a healthy mind, and a healthy spirit) attracts other folks like a magnet. I guess, other folks would like to get magnetized by such 'strong' people.

Be Happy! Choose to be Happy. Remain Happy.

Until next time,

- Saurav.

Where to find happiness?

24-7-2007 11:25 a.m. IST

All creatures of God want happiness -- defined in their own terms, according to their instincts, acquired knowledge and experience.

Why? -- because we are all creation of God and desire to be with Him --- He, Who is infinite happiness incarnate --- a happiness and joy that can be felt by a pure mind of a child. That is why God is called 'Sat chit anand'. (More on this later!)

Where to find happiness?

We search for it in our close relationships of parents, spouse, friends, material belongings, etc. But more often than not, it is either a reducing happiness or just a passing phase (not lasting long enough).

For example, if I bought a car (or a house, or any such material possession), I am too excited and happy on getting it, slightly less the next day, even lesser with each passing day, till it looks outdated and a burden after some time.

Yes, when I go to a place of scenic beauty, a joy that fills up my existence does make me happy -- whenever I recall that experience.

For example, if I go to Darjeeling and watch outbreak of dawn from Tiger Peak. I enjoy the tall trees surrounding me and sun rising amidst snow capped mountains. It is as if liquid gold is pouring into a silver bowl. This happiness is definitely of a superior quality than the joy of possessing a car; also this lasts longer. (Label it 'Scenario 1')

Let us see what happens if the above example is repeated ('Scenario 2') with me having a severe headache. The liquid gold will pour into the silver bowl but I would not enjoy the experience.

Also if ('Scenario 3') I have to rush back immediately since a near and dear one is on deathbed, I still do not enjoy the liquid gold pouring into a silver bowl.

The difference between these scenario is only my state of mind!

In 'scenario 1' the mind is lost into the nature's beauty and stopped thinking of me - a person called amarendra. In other scenario (2 & 3) the mind kept remembering amarendra as the body and the person.

So the conclusion is that if my mind can stop thinking about me, I can be happy as long as the mind is in that condition.

But how to do that? Every time I see something, or do some thing, I relate it to myself and with that remember myself. Do I stop thinking about myself and become vulnerable? What happens to all the learning about survival, growth and profit? Also, am I not thinking of MY happiness during all the above discussions?

Want to know 'HOW"? Wait for the next posting on this forum!